found this pic somewhere .

sometimes i also feel like this girl. wanting to end everything in my life and escape from the reality. but somehow, i cant. the pain in my heart is unable to be healed. you said dun ever get revenge. but you dun understand me.  whats the point of having me when you hated me. but  i alr dun mind you hate me le. its pointless.

i missed secondary school life. it is always fun cause i have my sisters with me. the days when me and en crazy and high at school and anooy wee yin . and the hangover days . its fun. we shared pain and laughter.

i dun make new year's resolution because i know i wun make it anyways.

wad i yearn for , i will never get it. cause slowly the feeling will fade away from me and leaving , a empty shell. i wonder if one day i will become cold blooded. hahaha.

i wanted to thanks my bibi . for giving me the tender love and care . you make me realise that love can be this sweet. even if the whole world hate me, i will still have you <3  i love you fufu .

I dunno why I enjoyed anime and manga a lot. I feel that it is really a work of art. The storys are touching and amazing. It never fails to amaze me. I can even cry when being touched. Hahaha. Some stories need to be told, anime style.

okay... shagged ttm . when i thought that my throat is finally okay it came back to hunt me!! T.T wth sia. christmas is here soon ~~ which means is me and fufu de 1year!! he finally promise to treat me eat at manpuku and i dun want to miss the chance )':

ytd went pp find en at work ^^  it was raining heavily !! so we went bedok eat dinner. we talk and talk . i realised that when we treat someone as a sister , we really treat that person v good. i want to tell someone that " girl ! we really treat you as a good sister . you always asked us to help you with makeup and clothes, we spend most our time helping you and satisfying you ! BUT you didnt appreciate us !! you go around telling other ppl bad about us and about our bad our make up is, our clothes doesnt match behind our back! and you still dare to act like nothing . you ownself already need ppl help you make up alr and you still compare us ?! haha, look at yourself when saying others. PLEASE la!  you think that other ppl is willing to ALWAYS help you no matter wad and STILL listen to your constant nagging ?! NO ! a NORMAL friend wun do that ! we had been very kind to you and dun take advantage of us! theres a limit to everything ! "   okay... i finally release my anger. some ppl just wun apprecaite others. tsk .

okay. ytd had a family dinner at orchard holiday inn ^^ ate alot of good food ~ got lobsters, crabs, shell fishes , sharkfin soup, turkey, chocolate fountain and etc ..  eat until i got a tummy ! x.x but its worth it ! ^^

tomoro i shall go see doctor !  must get better !! ROARS!!

i know you n father hates me alot. but im alr tired of all this. pls dun give me a hard life. im a human too, i have a heart. yours words really hurt me alot. put yourself in my shoes n see how i feel whenever you say those hurtful words to me? my bf only bring me go see docter den you say i pon school , threaten me to dun let me have bf and say  my bf teach me to pon school. it only laast week ! i have work interviews and im sick too , you know this de leh ! i know you dun like my bf la, dun need like that say wad ! you say i abit den cry. but did you know i cry because your words hurt me. every child wanted to be loved by their parents. i dont have that love. i yearn for it badly. pls dun keep compare me to my sisters . i am who i am, nobody else. i am original . TRY TO FEEL HOW I FEEL ! SO AMNY YEARS LE... WHY CANT YOU RESPECT ME AND UNDERSTAND MY FEELINGS?!?!!

Last friday en sis come my school meet me ^^ hahah. how sweet of her (:  den we went to my house and prepareee . after that went towwn. well, we talk about alot of things. its good to have someone as your listening ear :)

oh. me and fufu okay le ^^ after 1 day of quarrelling and cold shoulders, we finally okay le :) so happpyyyy~ I LOVE FUFU ALOT :D <3

for the next few days he promised me to company me for the whole day :D hehe. i felt even closer to him <3  nth is within our reach if we do it together.

my advanced birthday celebration is com,ing soon :D  cant wait ! so excited ! hahah. but before that is a 1 day trip to malaysia :/

I finally told him all my feelings. Hope he understands me. It takes me so much courage and heart to prepare for whatever happen next. Hope everything will goes well. Haha. Sometimes I wonder if you know my chararcter at all. It feel like you dun understand me at all.

i realize its good to use my blogg as a dairy. ^^ haha.

well, those pics are pictures last week ? o.o with en ^^

well, i thought it over alr. bibi, i dun mind it alr. cause i dun wan to quarrel with you everytime so i decided to hide my feelings. i just couldnt stand to give you the cold shoulder. i couldnt leave you alone. i know you wun hurt me on purpose. you tell me you love me everyday and its enough alr. cause i know you meant it. i dun mind you dunno how i felt. im fine...with it ? omg, im an idiot. well, its better this way. i dun mind being the one who's hurt the most, this heart of mine alr has too much scars, wun die taking a few more stabs. hahah.

tomoro going out with en ^^ so long no meet sis. gonna talk my heart out. i think i will feel better that way.

My heart is crying. Have you noticed anything wrong with me? Im trying to act like nth happen like what we always do after a fight. But its so hardd noww... I cant stand it anymore. Wad should I do? I feel so insecure. I keep asking myself do you still love me? Wad are you thinking?wad are your feelings? Im so troubled , wad should I do ? Ahhhh! Im going crazyy soon...

sorry im too emotional and posted angry words. im on my menses so it doubles the anger.

sometimes i can be  too clingy, too straight forward and childish but pls forgive me cause im trying v hard to maintain our relationship. im v straight forward to you  cause i dun wan to be fake in front of you, i tell you everything about how i feel but did you? im too clingy and childish cause i just wanted your attention. i want you to pay attention to me. i know you dun like but i will try my best to change but did you try too? i always try to tell you my feelings whenever im upset or angry, but did you ever understand how i feel? if me and your friends quarrel, who will you side? i dun think you will side me, you will only tell me why your friends are correct. you always scold me in public, i hate it. you want pride and face, i want it too. girls pride are more higher den boys, why? you will understand why if you know how hard girls try to make themselves beautiful outside and inside.  we come from different family back ground. our prospective of thinking is different. but i just want you to know iloveyou and will always do, no matter how much it hurts. <3

i dun think you will see so wahts the point in writing all this...

nowadays outings wif en^^  go shoppinig, sing k, etc.. i love this sis v much. we had been through a lot a lot and i feel that i can talk to her about anything , everything. cause she understands me. nowadays been feeling so shag..

you have know me for 1 year plus le, you should know my characteristic by now. im a very straight forward person, i speak up my mind. im not afraid to tell you the truth about how i feel . everytime after we quarrel you always pretend nth happen and den you did the same thing again n agian.  i love you alot, i always stick to you, ic an be sweet n cruel too. i really dislike to have mood swings during my menses. zzz

zzz lets forget that. my birthday coming. i planning a advance birthjday celebration ^^ i looking forward to it. hope no party spoilers come spoil my mood ! just because you are my bf's friend i am very poilte to you. dun try me.